Modern Married Indian Women

Modern married Indian women  are a confused lot today. Yesterday’s traditional and conservative value systems combined with today’s predominantly liberal urban environment provoke deep and crucial questions related to self-esteem, power equations, rights and duties of the male and the female spouse among others at a macro level in society as well as at a micro-level in individual homes.

The Dynamics of the Matter

With this confused self-identity, when a woman enters into a marital arrangement, transactions often include conflicts, complications, and that is how negative relationship dynamics result.

Men, on their part, are quite confused too since even they are not sure about what position they would like to give to their female partners. Input from their mothers and family members confuse them even more and with their egocentric positions, they only end up complicating matters further.

Is it any wonder then that the divorce rate of Indian marriages has gone up significantly in the present generation when compared with the earlier generations. The root cause of most cases of divorce we see today in Indian society lies in the female spouse’s refusal to accept unfair treatment from the male partner.

The Unfair Reality

Preeti grew up in a loving and happy family in a small town in India. She was a ‘convent-educated girl’ who was trained in all sorts of housework and was a perfect candidate for an arranged marriage.

She got married when she was only 23 and at her mother-in-law’s insistence, she took up a job as a school teacher in a neighborhood school. She had to get up at 4am every day, complete cooking for all her family members, get ready and leave for school where she worked for the next six and a half hours continuously.

After she got back home, her mother-in-law kept a series of household chores ready for her to complete as she did not want to spend money on a house maid. By the time Preeti’s husband got back from work, she felt like a log of wood. Despite repeated requests, Preeti’s mother-in-law refused to hire a maid to make life bearable for her and insisted that she do all the work herself.

Things became ugly when Preeti revolted against such inhuman treatment. She scolded her husband in front of the family for not standing up for her and threatened everyone with divorce unless they mended their ways.

Conclusion – Modern Married Indian Women

In this time of rapid transition in the status of the urban Indian Married Woman, at home and in society, it is important for the female spouse to be strong and patient.

Assertiveness, as opposed to aggressiveness is the need of the hour when it comes to resolving pertinent matters related to the woman’s (and the man’s) rights and duties in a household and more importantly, in marriage.

More often than not, all issues can be resolved through firm and polite dialogue and explaining your viewpoint as well as feelings in a clear manner to all concerned. More marriages might survive if the partners realize that sometimes the better comes after the worse.