How To Make A Relationship Last
As long as you remember the person who loved you, and whom you still love, then you’re making love endure. ~ Guillaume Musso (Tweet this)
Of course we all hope that our relationships last forever, but there is a difference between hoping and doing something about it. Despite the fact that there are plenty of couples who don’t make it even a few years into their marriage, there are arguably just as many that have been together for 20 years or longer.
Tips on how to make a relationship last forever:
For tips on how to make a relationship last, we turned to those couples—the ones who know how to make it last.
1. Spend lots of time together
Though this seems like an obvious suggestion, it may come as a surprise to some people. Some of the couples that have been together the longest emphasize the fact that they spend a ton of time together. As we grow older, it is harder to maintain friendships for a number of reasons—people grow apart, people get married and have kids, jobs get in the way, etc.,
For those reasons alone, it is really important to spend a lot of time with your partner. Eventually, you two will have each other more than you will have anyone else—it is a good idea to find the joy in that early on.
2. Become best friends
Similar to spending a lot of time together, becoming one another’s best friend is a really vital step towards keeping your love strong. If you two are connected romantically as well as in a companionship way, your love will grow strong and stay strong.
The last love is the most lasting of loves. ~ Amit Abraham (Tweet this)
3. Reach a financial agreement
One of the worst things to fight about, with a partner or with a friend, is finances. Money can get tricky between anyone, and you and your loved one are likely not an exception to that rule. Before you get married or get into a long-term partnership with one another, it is important to discuss some vital financial issues—joint bank accounts, who will work full-time v. who will work part-time etc., Money between friends is tricky, and money between partners can be just as tumultuous.
4. Don’t go to bed mad
It is an age-old saying, but there really is some truth to it. Of course, it is nearly impossible to always go to bed happy, but it is vital that you and your partner try to work through any issues you have before you go to sleep. Whether you are sleeping next to one another or separately, going to sleep while upset with one another creates animosity and resentment. Avoid that at all costs.
5. Sit next to each other
When you are having friends over for wine or tea or a movie night, choose each other. Cozy up next to your loved one, no matter how long you two have been together. Go out to dinner and sit on the same side of the booth. Hold hands in the movie theater.
Being sweet and comfortable with each other, in public and in private, will remind you both that you love one another very, very much.
6. Laugh a lot
Of course, laughter is always the best medicine. Laughing with your partner—truly, truly laughing out loud—can work wonders for the relationship. Those who laugh together stay together.
7. Have a date night
One particular couple who has been together for 27 years suggested never skipping a date night. Nobody likes having plans cancelled on them, and that same thought process should go into your date nights with your long-term partner.
If you two have a permanent Wednesday night dinner planned, work really hard to never miss it. If you suggested seeing the latest ballet performance at your local theater, make sure you stick to it when it comes time to attend. Cancelling is never a good feeling, no matter how genuine the excuse is. Stick to your plans, always.
8. Reflect on the good times
Of course, every long-term relationship has had its ups and downs. Dwelling on the negative times in your relationship is not going to benefit either of you. If your relationship overcame a particularly tough obstacle in the past, there is no reason to look back and focus on that in the future.
Spending time working on your future together while remembering the great things—your wedding, the birth of your first child, your first apartment together—is the key to moving forward positively.
9. Don’t believe in divorce
Yes, divorce happens, and sometimes it really is for the best. However, if you go into your marriage considering divorce as an option, you are not doing yourself any favors. If you and your partner view divorce as an impossibility, you will find yourself fighting through the hard times with even more fervor.
10. Prioritize one another
Your partner should come first, above everyone else, even yourself. It is important to keep yourself happy, but once you have made a commitment to someone, it is incredibly significant to maintain that commitment. You are important, and so are all of your ambitions in life. Your partner was once one of those ambitions. If you start to lose sight of that, remember that he or she is your priority. The rest will fall into place.
It is possible to maintain a strong, healthy, loving relationship for the length of your life. Look to the couples who have survived everything, the highs and the lows. You can learn how to make a relationship last forever—you just need to find the person who is willing to take that journey with you.
Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction. ~ Saint Exupery (Tweet this)