Closure in a Relationship – Sometimes it’s Better to Move On

closure in a relationship

There comes a point in life many a time, when it is best to bid adieu to a relationship which has started giving more unhappy moments than happy ones.

It is not easy for most of us to hang on to the dying embers of a relationship in the hope that it will re-ignite again and be just like before. Sometimes it is best to get closure in a relationship and move on to a better life.

Being an optimist

While it is always recommended that one look at the silver lining rather than at the dark clouds, don’t miss the signs that perhaps the relationship has run its course.

Some of you might believe that a loving relationship can never ‘run its course.’ That there is no closure in a relationship—it is eternal. But, the reality of life is that some of the most loving relationships fall apart.

Had that not been true, one would have never heard of divorces or instances where once-upon-a-time best friends spewed venom on each other.

Read more about getting a divorce in a amicable way in our post Getting a divorce.

Forever

Philosophically one might say that not everyone in life is meant to be there forever, but if we delve a little deeper we would be able to perhaps understand why some relationships slip away.

Some of the perhaps most common reasons for drifting apart are,

  • taking a long-term relationship for granted (yes, I know we hear this very often, but tend to overlook the importance of this aspect),
  • lack of sensitivity,
  • no real communication and last but not least,
  • perhaps both the individuals may have ‘grown’ differently over a period of time.

What is this ‘taking for granted’ one keeps hearing? It is essentially lack of appreciation and the inability to empathize. It is forgetting to say a sorry or thank you, when it matters, and that is when the sourness creeps in.

Avoid the bitterness

How does one avoid the bitterness in parting to get closure in a relationship? It can happen when there are no expectations from the relationship. This is only possible when we reduce our emotional dependence on the person or relationship concerned.

One of the ways is to walk away from the decaying relationship, while keeping the happy moments shared as a sweet memory. Let not the anger in trying to sort out the relationship make one end up spewing venom or reveal once-shared secrets. This is perhaps the least one can do, in the memory of good times shared.

Closure in a Relationship

One might ask, is closure in a relationship really important? Yes, it is. After all, if we keep going around in circles (and waste our energy on it) when will we ever be able to move on? It is this inability to say goodbye which does not allow us to be open to fresh learning and experiences.

It is precisely this reason why, when someone disappears or becomes lost, we find it harder to accept and move on (since the fond hope of return is always there), more so than when a person passes away (death has a definitive closure).

Thus, sometimes it is better to give up the unhappy relationship, say au revoir and walk away to something more inspiring and invigorating in life. Yes, sometimes closure in a relationship is a better option.

About the Author

Nishi Roy is business writer by profession. What she loves most is being able to delve a little deeper into situations and people and share her understanding through her writing voice

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