Stop Self-Loathing and start Self-Loving

There is no such thing as a perfect human being. That’s the beauty of it. We are all different and that is why there is so much fun and unexpected things in our lives. Otherwise it would have been so boring if all people had the same mindset and the same way of thinking and expressing.

Well, we are not going to discuss this of course, but we all are different and that is how it will be. The nature of man lies in the fact about how he thinks about his own self and the world around him. His actions and reactions will also tell about the nature of the person.

There are people who are short-tempered, some are introverts, some are bold, others are impulsive and some other self-loathing people. Stop self-loathing start self-loving. Be kind to yourself and become the person you wish to meet. Nothing in life is as beautiful as loving yourself.

Self-Loathing is Dissatisfaction

Self-loathing is a feeling about oneself and the way we perceives things. The problem can get worse in any kind of relationship or friendship. The unwanted feelings, worthlessness and not being loved can trigger self-loathing. There are many reasons why some do not love themselves. Events like:

  • Humiliation
  • Abandonment
  • Rejection
  • Bullying
  • Family Negligence or Parents  may lead to self-loathing.

However, it is a natural feeling and develops gradually as they believe that they are good for nothing. The fact is that most people do not know that they suffer from the self-loathing condition. The negative thoughts also fuel the feelings. It is so deeply rooted within that they are stored in the subconscious mind.

Consequences of Self-Loathing

A person who hates himself is never happy and is always thinking negatively. He also has self-destructing tendencies and may cause harm to himself. He even tries to take the blame for everything that goes wrong. Eventually there is a tremendous loss of self-confidence and he will be left alone in the world.

They try to live alone and lose contact of the world outside. Although they do not harm others in anyway, they are indirectly responsible for others in the family if they have a spouse or children. It does influence others as well. A person who is a self-hater does not know what he is going through and tends to be in that state.

All this leads him to be weak, empty inside, without a relationship, insecurity, and unable to enjoy life in their own way.

Process of healing

All that they we want is some love and that can be gradual. First of all, if you think you hate yourself, you have to find the reason for this. May be it has to do with your childhood factors or events. It may be happening in the office or it happened in school or college. Things which have affected you strongly will have a lasting effect on you.

When we don’t know who to hate, we hate ourselves ~ Chuck Palahniuk (Tweet this)

Begin by loving yourself. Although it is not fast and easy, you have to try hard. Start with smaller steps by praising yourself in front of the mirror or with the tasks that you have achieved. You can pamper yourself a little by buying yourself a treat or an expensive gift. May be you are not ready to join your friends yet, but you can start with one or two people at a time.

Talk to yourself about others and about what you love and hate. You have to open up so that people know who you are. You can choose to stay with people who have a positive attitude towards life. So, release your self-loathing and breathe in love, for love cannot be felt when there is no space for it.

About the Author

Vandana Singhal writes extensively on science, technology, health, and travel. Vandana has a degree in science and is artistic in nature.

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