Internal Dialogue – Control what You Tell Yourself

Internal Dialogue

Ever heard anyone talking to himself aloud? The first thought to cross your mind must’ve been that the guy must be crazy or disturbed or something similar. But do you know that you too talk to yourself constantly without a break—except maybe when you’re asleep.

Most people don’t speak out their internal dialogue (not immediately at least) but the conversation is on every minute they’re awake. This dialogue affects every aspect of our lives more strongly than anything else.

Yes, it’s even more important than the money we possess or the relationships we share with others or the situations we face in life.

What is Internal Dialogue?

Simply put, internal dialogue is what you tell yourself all the time. If you tell yourself hurtful things then your self esteem, relationships, career and money will all reflect it since everything in your life is congruent with your internal dialogue. How we think of ourselves is strongly reflected in our internal dialogue.

In case you’re not aware of what you think about yourself, start paying attention to that internal dialogue and you will soon realize it consciously.

Once you become aware of any unreasonable self-deprecating thoughts that you might have about yourself as a result of any past experience or experiences, stop them immediately and forgive yourself or any other person involved in the experience that might have shaped your self-image negatively.

A Weak Self-image

Seema was a seemingly confident girl who had grown up in a middle class home with her parents and elder brother. Her brother, Harish, was a loving but overbearing sort of person who always used to control and dominate her every step of the way.

Such constant domineering behavior weakened her self image and made her think of herself as being incapable and weak. Such a self-image constantly made her anxious and nervous and she couldn’t even face the minor challenges that life posed without feeling panicky and worried.

The root cause behind this was the internal dialogue that constantly went on in her head in which she could hear her brother’s negative judgments about everything she did. Since she wasn’t aware about how internal dialogue works and how easily it can be controlled, she lived a troubled sort of life without ever knowing how to be truly calm and peaceful.


Most people continue living with the internal dialogue that was programmed by someone else in their childhood or life without ever taking charge of their thoughts and steering their lives in a positive direction.

Its time to ask yourself if you want to continue living like a victim of someone else’s insensitivity or fill up your mind with the kindness and love that is directed at the companion who is with you throughout your journey through life—you!

Monitoring one’s internal dialogue is the best gift one can give to oneself as that way no negative thought or experience will be able to take a toll on one’s mind. We can’t control the experiences that life brings our way but we can surely control our response to those situations by keeping a tab on our internal dialogue and ensuring that it remains compassionate and constructive instead of becoming harsh and destructive.

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About the Author

Richa is a writer and a life skills coach with seven years of work experience in training corporate professionals. She has trained employees in Soft skills, Sales and Business English.

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