Go Beyond the WHY And Ask HOW

Significance of Why - Ask how

The significance of the question “why” can be humongous in life. When used in a science lab “Why” can be the most relevant question you can ask. Why does an apple fall down instead of going up? Why do planets keep rotating without falling? Some of our greatest discoveries have come from asking “why.” All these are relevant, logical questions which can be answered specifically. Asking “why” can also lead to wonderful exchanges of conversation and points-of-view, which in-turn educate and stimulate the mind.

  • Why am I living this life?
  • Why are others happy when I am not?
  • Why has my girlfriend betrayed me?
  • Why is my boss so impracticable?

Sometimes, asking why works miracles. Other times, in our personal life, sometimes the same question of why, when asked repeatedly, can make our life hell. In an attempt at digging up the past to understand why it happened, we make things miserable. Life doesn’t always give us prudent answers. In fact sometimes it is better to leave some questions unanswered.

Significance of WHY

I am not denying the relevance of why. For example, in an organization it is important to know why loss happened, so that mistakes are avoided to better maximize profits. Similarly in your personal life you might want to know why an event happened. For instance if a child lies to his/her parents, then it is a significant question. In cases like these, you can ask why and reduce the magnitude of problem. But stay with me here and find out when it might be better to ask how instead.

My aunt lost her husband at a very young age. She was devastated. With two young daughters it now became important for her to join her husband’s business on his behalf. She didn’t though. Instead, she refused to go in saying that she feels worse in the office. This went on for 2 years.

For literally 2 years she didn’t own up to her responsibilities. She got lost in the why. Why did this happen to me? Why did my daughters have to bear this loss? The partners started cheating her and taking away her husband’s share. By the time she realized this, of course, it was too late. What would have helped her, would have been to instead ask how. Ask how you can feel better about being in the office, and you have a chance of making it. Refuse, and you suffer the consequences. Well… at least she suffered the consequences anyway.

Stop asking why. Ask how.

Instead of asking why, why don’t we ask how the next time we are faced with a major problem? Ask, How can I enjoy my life? How can I spend more time with my family? How can I succeed? How can I be a better person? Instantly the mental conditioning transforms from a weak, negative person into a courageous, confident one.

He who has a WHY to live for, can bear almost any HOW. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche (Tweet this)

We keep wasting our energy, time, intellectual ability and even our peace of mind in asking why whereas if we ask how, we gain direction, strength, courage and the focus we need to progress. Here is an even better reason to ask how, not why. My favorite, in fact.

Why is Past, How is Future

There’s no rocket science behind the idea that too much of ‘Why‘ brings negativity. Think about it. This is always a question of “poor me.” Why does this always happen to me? etc. When you do that too often, or for too long, you stay stuck in the past.

When we ask how, on the other hand, we condition ourselves to start solving problems instead of just questioning them. We also start to see the positive side of life, because we realize that all things are possible. If you only ask why, though, not only are you stuck in the past, you are also endangering your future. We think, had the past only been more beautiful, the future would have been brighter. We need to free ourselves from the past, to both live in the present and to also enjoy our future.

Life is a concoction of so many different things already that it often puts us in circumstances which can’t be reasoned out. Which means that if you spend your time asking why, you’ll never find the results you seek. ” Go beyond the WHY and ask HOW..

For a prosperous, blessed life, ask how, not why!


About the Author

Vandana is a Personality Enhancement Trainer associated with various Corporate and Management Colleges.

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